Pros and Cons of a Trial Separation in a Marriage

By The Law Offices of Ronald K. Stitch|February 15, 2023

Marriage is a complex and dynamic relationship. It’s not uncommon for couples to face challenges and difficulties.

One potential solution that some couples may consider is a trial separation. A trial separation is a temporary period in which a couple decides to live apart and evaluate their relationship.

There is no universal answer to whether a trial separation is worth attempting. As the following overview indicates, there are potential pros and cons to be aware of.

Pros of a Trial Separation

  • Time to reflect: A trial separation can allow couples to reflect on their relationship and consider what they want for the future. This can be a valuable time for individual growth and self-reflection.
  • Space to work on personal issues: A trial separation can allow couples to work on personal problems that may impact their relationship. This may include individual therapy or counseling to address the underlying issues.
  • Reduced conflict: If a couple is experiencing a high level of conflict in their marriage, a trial separation may provide a period for both parties to cool down and reflect on their behavior.
  • Opportunity to reevaluate priorities: A trial separation can allow couples to rethink their priorities and determine what is most important. This can help them to make informed decisions about the future of their relationship.

Cons of a Trial Separation

  • Increased uncertainty: A trial separation can be a stressful and uncertain time for both parties. Knowing the future and whether the relationship will survive can be challenging.
  • Risk of divorce: While a trial separation can provide couples with the opportunity to work on their relationship, it can also increase the risk of divorce. If the couple cannot resolve their issues during the separation period, it may be not easy to salvage the relationship. That said, it’s essential to understand that getting a divorce is the best course of action when spouses can’t make a marriage work. In the long run, removing yourself from a relationship that causes pain could result in greater happiness for everyone involved.
  • Financial strain: A trial separation can be expensive, as both parties must maintain separate households, which can strain their finances.
  • Impact on children: If the couple has children, a trial separation can be challenging for them. Children may feel uncertain and anxious about their family’s future and struggle to adjust to the new living arrangements.

Factors to Consider

If a couple is considering a trial separation, there are several factors they should consider before making a decision:

  • Goals: What are the goals of the trial separation? Are both parties committed to working on the relationship, or is the separation a precursor to divorce?
  • Communication: Can the couple communicate effectively during the separation period? If communication is a challenge in the relationship, a trial separation may not be effective.
  • Logistics: Can the couple afford to maintain separate households during the separation period? Are there practical considerations, such as custody arrangements for children, that must be addressed?
  • Support: Do both parties have a support system to help them through the separation period? This may include friends, family, or a therapist.

Next Steps After a Trial Separation

None of this is meant to be “official” advice. No one can say whether a trial separation is proper for you and your spouse. This is a matter you must carefully consider on your own.

If you proceed with a trial separation, you might conclude that entering into a legal separation or even getting divorced is the ideal choice after some time.

If you’re ready to take these steps, having the right attorney is essential. The Law Offices of Ronald K. Stitch, a Westlake Village and Simi Valley divorce and legal separation lawyer, can provide the legal assistance you need. Learn more by contacting the office online or calling 818-707-0202.

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